Spirituality That Works

Q: You talk about “responsibility without drama.” What does that actually mean in the context of our everyday reactions?

It means owning our reactions without adding extra spin.

Most of us have been conditioned to have knee-jerk reactions when we’re upset. In the heat of a disagreement, a comment hits us the wrong way, and before we know it, we’re flying off into our storyline, piling on default emotions and old memories. We start replaying words, assigning meanings, comparing what … Read More

Q: What we think of as consciousness, is this different from the idea of a soul?

The word “soul” is often used in a religious context to mean an individual, eternal entity that goes to an afterlife. Consciousness is the fundamental, universal field of awareness in which all things, living and non-living, appear. It is the very fabric of the All-That-Is, permeating every part.

The difficulty with both words is in the definition of the word and how they are … Read More

Q: Spiritual conversations seem obsessed with awakening moments. Big insights. Bliss. Unity. That sudden, unshakable knowing. That’s not where most of us are, and it feels like they just create envy rather than motivation. Why do those moments get so much attention?

A: Yeah, peak experiences are the stuff of legends, aren’t they? They make for compelling books and podcast stories. And yes, they’re absolutely real. But after decades of practice, teaching, and watching how insight actually plays out in … Read More

Q: I see the value of meditation. But what I’d like to know is what’s actually happening. How is meditation able to change us, physically, mentally, spiritually? What’s going on?

The autonomic system is being told that it’s okay to relax. Breathing slows, the heartbeat slows, thinking slows. Brain activity moves into quieter patterns. The body expends less energy on stress responses. Healing speeds up, because there’s less interference.

The emotions are told that it’s alright to stop being on … Read More

Q: The spiritual path can be lonely. How do we deal with this loneliness?

Loneliness on a spiritual path can be a positive sign of growth. It means you no longer feel that you fit with those not on a spiritual path and may not have found a community yet that does.

That’s stage one. Let’s call it the Misfit Stage; you are in the “between” space where the old world has lost its appeal, but the new world … Read More

Q: How do we know when it’s time to make a major life change?

On an arbitrary scale of 1 to 10, how restless are you? If the number is higher than 5, it’s time to think about making a change. If the number is higher than 7, it’s time to be actively looking. If the number is higher than 9, change becomes mandatory.

To define the restlessness we’re talking about here, it’s when nothing feels comfortable. Nothing feels right. … Read More

Q: Many of us find ourselves reflecting on the meaning of life. Many of us develop our own theories and beliefs. Many get the meaning supplied by religious and spiritual traditions. From your perspective, what is this time here as humans really about?

It is about wonderment.

Wonderment that any of this exists. That you exist. That you have the ability to create, to manifest, or to destroy. That you live on a planet that is unparalleled in beauty, yet … Read More

I’ve always been drawn to older spiritual texts. There is something about their language that feels settling, especially when compared with much of what we read today.

That’s because language does more than pass along information. It shapes attention. It affects the nervous system of the listener.

This got me thinking about the differences between modern language and older spiritual language.

Modern Language and the Need to Win

Much of modern language is structured around assertion and opposition. It assumes … Read More